Monday, September 20, 2010

how i met your mother

i heard this on 'how i met your mother' today:

"shouldn't we hold out for the person who doesn't just tolerate our little quirks but actually kinda likes them?"

i'm always going to be that girl who likes dessert just a little too much, who isn't interested enough in politics to have a long debate but still has an opinion that wants to be valued, who likes wearing flowy dresses, who likes to wander the new york city streets aimlessly and who is just a little bit too loud once in a while.

shouldn't i hold out for the person who kinda likes my quirks, and doesn't just tolerate them?

and shouldn't i wait to be with someone who's quirks i like, and don't just have an 'open mind' about?

yes and yes.

so many signs so many signs.

Thursday, September 16, 2010

on God

God has a plan for everyone. Who am I to complain and cry about it?

I'm fact, I know! that God's plan for me is going to be so great - and while thing's hurt me right now's all part of the plan!

perhaps this post makes no sense..but it's my optimistic post of the week/year.

deal with it.

Tuesday, September 14, 2010


i'm wearing a mask when i talk to you.

yes, that right. you right there. you reading this. you on the phone. you, you and you.

all of you.


Friday, September 10, 2010

gotta love those cliches

it's getting harder and harder for me to keep repeating 'everything happens for a reason' and 'at the end of the day it will all be ok' and 'it is what it is' mantras.

when are they going to become a reality?

people say its important to have patience.

i've been patient - i know patience...and honestly, she's being a bitch.

i need a sign. please please please just give me a sign to confirm the cliches i hold as truths spouted from the sky.

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

moping enabler

there's a guy in school who mopes with me.

we mope about our lost loves together.

it's cathartic - almost like scratching a scab when its itchy...

until the scab gives way to bright red oozing blood.

hopefully my venting with my moping enabler won't cause the same sort of pain.

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

500 days..

Summer: I woke up one morning and I just knew.
Tom: Knew what?
Summer: What I was never sure of with you.


sometimes, one feels out of control.

you can't control the viewpoints of others and the decisions of others.

unfortunately these decisions can sometimes affect you very badly - and this feeling is due to their decisions, which are completely out of your control.

today i was feeling particularly void of control, and then i realized that i have control over myself, over my health, my work and my body.

and so - i went to LA boxing and purchased a 9 month membership. I paid upfront, thus I cannot cancel, and thus I have just invested quite a bit of money towards toning up and getting into much better shape.

maybe i can't control people's feelings and decisions - but I can control the way I react to them, and I refuse to react by sitting on a couch eating chocolate covered ginger until I feel sick and unhealthy.

and so - i will box. box to get out my frustrations and box to toughen up my mind, body and spirit.

also - i will box b/c i paid too much not to - and i don't want to waste money. though i feel that spending money on boxing is equivalent to spending money on therapy - with an added perk of toning up and increasing endurance.

wish me luck!